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radgoku:

i dont think my friends understand. when i say my room is messy i dont mean “cute” messy where i have a jacket hanging here and there i mean messy as in fuckin trash island where garbage citizens hold elections over who will become the next trash overlord it’s fuckin gross

bombing:

attention passengers this is your pilot speaking, we’re going to be experiencing some heavy turbulence shortly so please strap in. this loser just bet that i couldn’t do a 360 barrel roll in this thing and let’s just say i’m about to be $20 richer real soon

nickfuckface:

parents: “u should be more active”
me: image

(Source: nickfuckface)

digivolvin:

last night i dreamed that scientists used a really bad picture of me to prove humans are closely related to goats and i was so insulted i woke up